Monday, September 18, 2006

Scared



Good morning. I have so much stuff to do today. I didn't do hardly anything yesterday.
This morning I wish I knew what God's plan is. Does he want me to live here in WA or in ID with my daughter? Stay here or relocate? Stay here (out of jail,) Go (possibly end up in jail.) I really don't know how to pack my things. Should I pack as if all will be well and I'll be coming Home in a week or should I pack like I expect to get arrested and I may not be coming back in 6 months or so? Do I take everything of value with me?

I have been a nervous wreck the last 2 days. I HATE BEING LOCKED UP!!! I suppose then I shouldn't have ran from this issue 4 years ago. Who knows I may possibly be able to "fly" in under the radar, and have a great time all week. And I may not. I'm ok with getting this taken care of. At first it will be quite painful but in the long run it will reap many rewards.

A few months ago (or more???) I wrote in my journal to my daughter that I would do anything for her. Except go to jail. And now I suppose that I'm willing to even go to jail, should that be the case. I think that this vacation is going to be a very different experience for me. I don't think that I will be just going their and coming back. No I think their is a hidden left hook somewhere. This could also be my paranoia seeping through?

I plan to blog at least once while I'm their. But for now I have a very busy day today and I must get started.
I hope all is well with all of you.
have a great day.
Merry CHRISTmas.
Gregory

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3 comments:

dAAve said...

Talk all of this over with your sponsor.

Sober Chick said...

I second daave's suggestion. Keep the courage str8 my friend.

Alcoholic Brain said...

Find a meeting...