Friday, August 18, 2006

Home?

Good Evening. The Encarta world dictionary defines home as: 5 SAFE PLACE a place where a person or animal can find refuge and safety or live in security. Two of three of us were given a warning today on our rental situation. Not to say my shit does not stink but I do not feel that most of the troublesome "issues" are coming from my end. I Would love to move out if nothing more than to get away from Minnie! But their are people that want to see me stay in the same place for a year so I'll suffer through what ever shit I have to suffer through. I've begun to make a lot of sacrifices in preparation of my daughter coming to live with me. And many more are to come in the future. Living with my sponsor is great. He's a fantastic man. I look up to him A LOT! Rent is Very cheap (under $200). I do not want to see him have to live with Minnie nor do I want to see him end up back at the local mission! Or worse off homeless. I live in the living room and it's ok...No it sucks! But rent is cheap and I...I want to move out but I feel if 'ol Minnie and I could work things out then all would be well. Or if she got hit by a fast moving truck. Died of amoebic dysentery. A.I.D.S. Look at me and I just sent her an email saying I don't have any issues with her. I just don't like her and feel she is the reason this place does not seem like Home (whats your part Greg?) Yet their was a time not so long ago that I would have given anything to live in someone's living room, CHEAP. Now I'm just selfish and ungrateful about my living situation.
Lately I have been finding fault in others problems and way of life. I wonder why? Is it because the faults I see in others are the faults I see in me? What ever it is I don't like their faults or mine and would like to stop focusing on them!!! I have to get up in less than 4 hours to go to play time with Mr. M, so I had better go and get as much rest as I can. I will post more on this issue when I get home around 4pm pacific time so check back @ 5 to see what I come up with. God bless my friends. yfg

2 comments:

Mary Christine said...

What ever your biggest problem today is, it is your biggest problem today.

Or, a higher class of problems?

Alcoholic Brain said...

Oh ok I see. Turn it over. If you have a higher power as in step two and if you did a step three, issues become smaller, "things" become more manageabe so to speak. If not, try those steps, and part two of step one. Keep coming back!